Relationships are our lifeline. They make us who we are.
Be it the relationship of a mother with her children or the relationship with one’s life partner; our affinity to our in-laws or our dealings with our friends; our entire lives revolve around sustaining our relations.
Some relations are by chance; others are by choice. But both have the power to determine the course of our day, our attitude in our lives, our mood swings, our emotional balance and our ability to deal with challenges of our life.
Relationships are as multifarious as they are significant. They hold the key to our happiness as well as are the reason of our pain. Our desires, our hopes and our anticipations from each relation, change over time. Some become transparent and trustworthy as they age, while others become more superficial and obligatory due to their sensitivity. Some are just for social status whilst others are our professional needs.
Though the life of each relation is predetermined, there are very few relationships that stand the test of time.
What is the test of relations, you ask?
Relations that accept you the way you are, without expecting you to change or fit into ‘their’ idea of ‘You.’
Relations that understand your highs and lows and still choose to stand by your side;
Relations that accept that you too can be miserable/ outrageous at times but that doesn’t change your basic nature; that doesn’t change who you are; that doesn’t impact your love for them;
Relations that do not question your integrity or commitment at a slight flaw or omission;
Relations that do not expect you to be ‘perfect’ all the time;
Relations that do not require you to ‘prove’ yourself from time to time;
Do you have any relations that you feel stood the test of time or can stand the test of time?
These verses below may elucidate that.
Expectations, obligations
Arguments, disagreements
Heart sores, confrontations
Pain, aversion, uncertainties
Qualms, regrets, insecurities
Is this the life and end of all relations?
Weight of some acts or words,
Writes saga of those precious tears
Envy, suspicion, antagonism
Conflicts, opinions and judgments
How relations get trampled
Under burden of fears
Love, oh you must
Care, builds the trust
Tolerance, strengthens the roots
Understanding, shields from rust
But just one bitter word, one moment of rage
Is that enough a test of relations?
Why moments of laughter and affection
Why days of harmony and consensus
Why months of love and care
Why dreams of victory, quilled together
Weigh less than that one ominous moment
And drown in the tsunami of emotions
The test of time- must face all relations
Some walk the wire,
Some tremble at inception
Beliefs get nudged, equations change
Hope quavers, heart refrains
It’s a test of relations, life proclaims!
©Vandana Bhasin
